Saturday 21 November 2009

Israel Lobby

Actually Existing Imaginary Political Tendency

1. Make-believe intergalactic clan of Hebraic space lizards plotting the domination of Earth through the deployment of satellite lazers, telepathic mind-control and insidious tentacle porn, beloved of black helicopter-fearing, Reptilian-sniffing internet 9/11 Truther mentals.

Despicable, ludicrous fictional conspiracy theory, referred to solely by racists.

2. Actually existing in reality Anglo-American political tendency entirely composed of headbanging right wing fruitcake fucknuts, loudly and openly demanding deranged foreign policy initiatives and military carnage from positions within some of the world's most highly respected universities, political forums and best-selling newspapers.

Entirely unremarkable group of individuals engaged in thoroughly commonplace and humdrum attempts to influence government policy and public opinion through the medium of the popular press and glorified cheese and wine parties, any reference to the existence of which is racist in the extreme.

3 comments:

anonkammfan said...

I’m afraid that, whilst I don’t entirely disagree with what you have written, I sadly have to call into question the seriousness of your solidarity with the decent cause because it has been brought to my attention that you have manifestly failed to condemn the greatest threat facing Western civilisation, which, I am sure you already know but were too timorous to address the question is none other than the leftist blogger and sports-journalist who has frequently expressed his support for Slobodan Milosevic, Saddam Hussein, Darth Vader and Skeletaur: I speak (as you are no doubt aware) of none other than Neil ‘Hitler’ Clark.

Clark, as you are no doubt all too aware wrote a bad review of Oliver Kamm’s masterpiece: Neoconservatism: a cause for lefties. Most of the greatest thinkers have described this work as ‘Alexis de Tocqueville meets Aristotle with the crap bits left out’. As one noted academic once said ‘in the epic struggle for Western civilisation Clark is Ephialtes to Kamm’s Leonidas’. So, Mr Muscular, will you condemn? Mr Kamm has wasted hundreds of hours, which could be so profitably spent on making people happy with his presence and scrivening works of soaring intellectualism, attacking Neil Clark’s grammar and surely you could cut some slack for Comrade Kamm.

Anonymous said...

Dickwads who piss against each other on the internet are pretty crappy, aren't they. It's not like ones on your side are somehow really good, and ones who signed the Euston Manifesto are really bad. You're all chronically awful and laughable. You=your opponents.

Malky Muscular said...

Dickwads who piss against each other on the internet...

I've seen that video too.

You're all chronically awful and laughable.

Well, that's me told. I'm off to commit suicide now.