Mysterious time-travel device, the use of which allows one to change the very fabric of reality itself.
Useful for re-ordering the course of history to influence the present, thus resulting in swiftly altering rationales for certain foreign-policy disasters and Cold War bloodbaths.
"What the hell do you mean, we invaded Iraq to create an arc of democracy across the Middle East? I seem to remember some bullshit about mushroom clouds and remote-controlled planes dropping anthrax on Topeka..."
"Just a moment..." (Dashes off - Loud, rhythmic groaning sound of rip in space/time continuum, Returns)
"Now, what were you saying?"
"I was saying, whatever George Bush's faults, he's always been open about pushing for Middle Eastern democracy..."