Tuesday 6 November 2007

Responsibility

Noun

Reh-Sponce-Sib-Bill-Lit-Tay

Rhetorical ploy and moral blank cheque excusing any and all fatalities incurred during surgical strikes upon military targets - full and final culpability for any casualties resulting from the actions of Democrats.

"Let me see if I can pin down your point here. Surely the occupation of Iraq has been an abject disaster -"

"Yes, and one for which terrorists bear ultimate responsibility."

"Oh, come on, you're not suggesting that all those wedding parties that have been obliterated-"

"... Are unfortunate horrors, arising from the depravity of fascists."

"... Right. So when the Metropolitan Police mistakenly shoot a member of the public at point blank range, then pump exculpatory propaganda into the media, that would be-"

"That would be a disgraceful failure in operational procedures, compounded by a grotesque and deliberate strategy of misinformation."

"My goodness, really?"

"No, not really, you total retread - it's the fucking terrorists' fault again, isn't it?"

"I see. David Aaronovitch, thank you."

"No problem Jeremy, it's always a pleasure appearing on Newsnight."

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